« Everyone Loves Eating | Main | What's the airspeed velocity of an unladen buck? »

Two things that will totally gross you out if you are at all squeamish

One: At lunch today I got myself a Diet Pepsi out of the office vending machine and poured it into a cup. Klutz that I am, I managed to drop the quarter from my vending-machine change into the cup while trying to pour with the same hand. Two thoughts crossed my caffeine-deprived mind: "money dirty! ick!" and "what a shame to waste a whole can of soda!" So I poured the DP into a fresh cup (apparently wasting a cup is less of a shame than dumping a soda) and took the cup containing the wet quarter over to the sink. At this point my need for caffeine becomes sadly apparent, because in trying to get the quarter out of the cup -- a simple task, one might think -- I dropped it down the garbage disposal.

Remembering the admonition of past office signage, I decided to rescue the quarter instead of leaving it in the disposal. I stuck my left hand down there while keeping a hawk eye on the disposal power switch. I had to dig around the blades to get to the quarter (which was a Louisiana). But you can stop holding your breath, because despite my worst fears, no one burst into the kitchen to flip the switch on me. The only thing that happened was that when I pulled my hand out of the drain, it was coated in brown garbage disposal muck. EWW!

Two: My big toenail finally fell off. I injured it 13 weeks ago during a very long race and it had been just barely attached since then. But I am amazed at the body's ability to make things right, because even as the old dead nail fell off, I could see that there was a fresh new nail already grown halfway back underneath it. Hallelujah! I may yet wear tonail polish again! Internet friends, you can thank me later for sparing you the photos. Those of you who live close enough to see it in person may not be so lucky.

September 23, 2005 6:05 PM